2007 Reviews #130-#121

#130 - Code Name: The Cleaner - Ok, I fast-forwarded through this one, but from what I could see I could tell that it's one of those movies that never should have been made.

#129 - Thr3e - A lame serial killer movie that was marketed to Christian audiences because one of the characters was a missionary at some point... like that wasn't changed at the last second to justify the film's existance.

#128 - Norbit - The worst movie I actually sat through in all of 2007. The story is stupid, the characters are incredibly offensive and not in a smart-ass sort of South Park way, and the acting is atrocious. The fact that this movie actually got made indicates that there still are a lot of idiots in the world. The fact that it nearly made 100 million proves that there are a scary amount of said idiots.

#127 - Alvin And The Chipmunks - A terrible movie, but at least it's not completely racist. Basically, this is a stupid movie aimed at unsophisticated children and they're long-suffering parents. Jason Lee and David Cross each dropped their personal cool levels by 5% for appearing in this movie.

#126 - Epic Movie - If only people would stop paying to see these dumb movies they'd stop making them, or at least they'd start writing them better. Honestly, these movies seem to be written by children.

#125 - Bug - The movie is based on a play. An incredibly lame-ass and irritating play that lasts 90 minutes and seems more like 90 hours.

#124 - Hannibal Rising - Wait, this movie is only 3 removed from The Silence Of The Lambs? Shit, has any franchise disintegrated faster? The Exorcist? Superman, maybe? This movie is ugly and stupid and it's plot actually takes credibility away from plot developments in the other 3 movies! It's called direct-to-DVD, people.

#123 - Rush Hour 3 - Not that I ever cared about the first two, but this one was even worse. Chris Tucker waited like 8 years to make this film... and should have kept waiting.

#122 - Captivity - A new low in the torture horror genre, Captivity is ugly, disgusting and nasty with no redeeming social commentary to speak of.

#121 - The Hills Have Eyes 2 - The sequel to a re-make that isn't a re-make of the original's sequel. You know, no matter what the movie actually is described as, what it ends up being is pure splatter shit. A geek show, plain and simple.